Closing The Closet Door

The fabulous Rev. Ted Haggard, famed Crystal Methodist and male prostitute procurer, has announced that he is now "completely heterosexual." I don't really have anything to add to that -- because how can you embellish on a perfect punch line like that? -- I just wanted to share the joyous news with you, my loyal readers.

Praise the Lord and pass the lube, Rev. Ted. You're still just as fabulous as ever, no matter what orientation you claim.