No Cause for Alarm
In these days of peace and light and hearts and flowers and everything good and nice, it seems that every once in a while the gosh-darned lib'ral media just has try to mess things up for average Americans like us by reporting on some most likely fake story that's only designed to scare us.
Like this one, for instance.
I mean, what could be bad about the government just doing everything it can to keep us safe from terrorists and rogue nations and axises of evil and the gays? Isn't that what the government is for? So when an obviously communist -- or at least communist-influenced -- newspaper like the Salt Lake Tribune reports that our own Preznit-appointed Energy Secretary wants to start up testing nuclear devices again, I think we should just let him and the Preznit do whatever they want. Because how else are we going to be safe?
"Although scientists continue work on simulating nuclear bomb tests by computer, Energy Secretary Samuel Bodman said Tuesday that the Nevada Test Site's ability to resume actual underground warhead detonations must be enhanced.
"The Bush administration's commitment to step up preparations for a potential resumption of nuclear bomb testing in southern Nevada comes less than a week after the Utah Senate unanimously approved a House-passed resolution that urged the federal government not to 'return to the mistakes and miscalculations of the past which have marred many Utahns' and that would create 'a new generation of downwinders.'
"Thousands of Utah residents downwind of the Nevada proving ground blame atomic-bomb testing - which began in the 1950s and ended with a 1992 moratorium - for an airborne scourge of disease and death due to radioactive fallout.
"Appearing before the U.S. Senate Armed Services Committee, Bodman said the administration wants $2 billion in the next fiscal year for the nuclear weapon stockpile stewardship program, which verifies that America's aging atomic arsenal remains operational."
Well, my goodnes, what a bunch of nervous Nellies! As if our own government would do anything that might harm us!! That's just silly, don't you think? And you? And... what about you, sir, yes, you back there, the man from Park City with the two heads...?
Like this one, for instance.
I mean, what could be bad about the government just doing everything it can to keep us safe from terrorists and rogue nations and axises of evil and the gays? Isn't that what the government is for? So when an obviously communist -- or at least communist-influenced -- newspaper like the Salt Lake Tribune reports that our own Preznit-appointed Energy Secretary wants to start up testing nuclear devices again, I think we should just let him and the Preznit do whatever they want. Because how else are we going to be safe?
"Although scientists continue work on simulating nuclear bomb tests by computer, Energy Secretary Samuel Bodman said Tuesday that the Nevada Test Site's ability to resume actual underground warhead detonations must be enhanced.
"The Bush administration's commitment to step up preparations for a potential resumption of nuclear bomb testing in southern Nevada comes less than a week after the Utah Senate unanimously approved a House-passed resolution that urged the federal government not to 'return to the mistakes and miscalculations of the past which have marred many Utahns' and that would create 'a new generation of downwinders.'
"Thousands of Utah residents downwind of the Nevada proving ground blame atomic-bomb testing - which began in the 1950s and ended with a 1992 moratorium - for an airborne scourge of disease and death due to radioactive fallout.
"Appearing before the U.S. Senate Armed Services Committee, Bodman said the administration wants $2 billion in the next fiscal year for the nuclear weapon stockpile stewardship program, which verifies that America's aging atomic arsenal remains operational."
Well, my goodnes, what a bunch of nervous Nellies! As if our own government would do anything that might harm us!! That's just silly, don't you think? And you? And... what about you, sir, yes, you back there, the man from Park City with the two heads...?
posted by Generik at 3:40 PM
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