FEMA Fashion: The Scariest Halloween Costume

Monday in Manhattan: Mrs. Generik and I, being tourists in New York, were quite interested in seeing and participating in the big Halloween parade in Greenwich Village that goes on every year. Being the political sort that I am, and given that the theme of the parade was "Phoenix Rising" and dedicated to the victims of Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans, I figured that the scariest costume I could come up with would be a play on former FEMA director and Fashion God Michael Brown. Little did I know how prescient that choice would turn out to be...

To start, I glued the word "FEMA" and a box of brownie mix to a hard hat...

...along with three horse's asses, in a nod both to the International Arabian Horse Association and to the quality of the man I was portraying (Brownie himself, of course, represented the fourth Horse's Ass of the Apocalypse).

A white shirt and tie, rubber chest waders and a bright red-orange safety vest with "FEMA" on it almost completed the costume...

...along with a sign quoting the Preznit's own praise for Brownie: "Doin' a heckuva job."

Speaking of the Preznit, I met up with The Boss along the route. He gave me the big thumbs-up for the work I'd done. I reminded him that I'm still on the payroll, and asked when I could expect my Medal of Freedom. "Soon," he told me. "Right after Scooter and Turd Blossom get theirs."

Taking the subway back to the hotel, I put the fear of the lord into more than one late-night rider who was afraid I was there to help mitigate some disaster.


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