Tuesday, April 19, 2005

It's Cliff!

The Vatican announced today that long-time Cheers cast member and voice talent in numerous Pixar animated films John Ratzenberger has been selected as the next Pope.

"Who woulda thought that I'd get to wear the shoes of the fisherman? Wait'll I tell Ma!"

A devout Roman Catholic and beloved celebrity, Ratzenberger was something of a surprise choice by the College of Cardinals.

"We actually wanted Norm, I mean, George Wendt," said Cardinal Jorge Arturo Medina Estevez of Chile, "but sadly, he's Episcopalian. So we went with the other guy."

In keeping with centuries-old tradition, Ratzenberger has assumed a new name to go with the office. Henceforth, he will be known as Pope Cliff I. Pope Cliff celebrated by ordering XVI beers laced with Benedictine, which he shared with all his friends, well-wishers and ordinary strangers visiting Boston for the first time -- in fact, he gave one to everyone but Carla, with whom he has been feuding for the past nine years.
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